What can I say that will help you get through the lonely times this Christmas? How can I make you feel like you're part of the family right next to the tree opening gifts, but knowing that you're not? Where can I reach you in your heart that I haven't before to let you know how much your loved? When can I imagine what you are going through and have it make more sense to me? Why have these last five months seemed like 5 years?
Those are just some of the questions I'm thinking about this Christmas time, son. I know our situation is not unique.....there are thousands upon thousands of other military families feeling many of the same things. That in itself is some relief, but not nearly enough. You know, when you decided to enlist, I knew there would be things that we'd have altered in our lives. Some for the good...and some not so good. I'm sure you've thought that too.
I had someone ask me the other day what I remember most about you. Wow, if that's not a question that would bring the tears, huh? Well....here is what I said. I think of the great big hands you had when you were born. They were such big suckers....like they didn't even belong to you, you know. And as I think more about that question, I have come to a revelation of sorts. God equipped you with those big hands for a reason. He knew you'd one day be placed in situation that you'd have to know how to "handle" yourself. Hands and handle, get it. Yup, I think those big mitts are there for all that you are experiencing this year and the need for you to have the tools to do that. With that being said, I also hope that those same hands are being used for other things while in Afghanistan. Things like helping your other soldiers in the unit, giving a helping hand to an Afghan civilian but just being there, handy in so many ways.
|Merry Christmas to Kris and all of our Soldiers|
So, I'm going to pray for you son, that God would use you these last seven months to make a difference. Not just serve your time, but to make a difference and do things right. I'm going to also ask that you come to some definites in your life that you'd like to tackle once you get back to the states. Those are some big prayers I know....but I think it's time. This year will have been a great educator for you and for us. We will all be changed. The questions that I asked earlier will have more meaning when this deployment is completed. I'm excited to see where this takes us all. I hope you are too.
You know, this journaling thing is great. It gives a person an opportunity to dream and hope and wish and share. Almost like a bucket list, or at least a little bit like one. Let's try something together shall we? Let's you and me, together, like in giving me a "hand", wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and Holiday Season. And that someday, our holidays will be spent with our soldiers at home, safe, secure and loved.
Merry Christmas Sonpo....
223 days or 32 weeks to go however you look at it! Praying for your safety, son. Praying for you daily......